Have you ever had a relationship simply disappear before your very eyes? After the shock of realizing the other half of the relationship is gone, did you ever wonder, to yourself or even others, “What happened?”
Was it you? Was it the other person? Did a third person steal the relationship away?
Yeah. I’ve had those “What happened?” moments more times than I’d ever care to count. Luckily, I’ve kept the first, second, third, and fourth through ninth relationships in my life fairly solid over the long term. Ditto for a handful of truly close friendships as well.
Nonetheless, for the rest of those relationships that have slipped through my fingers, the common denominator is I did not take affirmative action on a daily basis to show I wanted to stay in that particular relationship with that particular person.
The one reciprocal truth of maintaining Great! relationships is this. “You find time daily to work on your most productive relationships and your most productive relationships are the ones you find time daily to work on.”
Susan and I believe so much in this concept, we listed it first in the 9 Most Important Things to Do in our Marital Symbiotics podcast. “1. Affirmatively want to stay married all the time – every second of every minute, hour, day, week, month, year, decade, and score of the rest of your lawfully wedded life.”
If you want any of your relationships to last, you have to do this same thing. Show you want to stay in that relationship all the time by doing something for the other part of that relationship every day.
[reminder]How many relationships did you lose through neglect last year?[/reminder]